Mrs. Umalakshmi Gulla is a mother of two, Deepthi and Dhiresh and grandmother of a 2 year old, Shaina. Her life wasn't that rosy as it looks now. She has earned this life which she is living with respect and dignity. Life threw her in some serious crisis where she has only one option and that was to accept and move. Though she could easily play a victim and get some sympathy and pity from people around but she was not looking for sympathy at all. Though she was broken after her husband's sudden demise, but she decided that she is going to be both set of parents after for her children. And then everyone saw how good she was at both the roles. She left no stone upturned in educating her kids and then organizing her daughter's wedding beautifully. And now when as major responsibilities are done, she is spending her quality time with her granddaughter Shaina.
Me: Though this question is not worth you and your journey still I would want to know how your journey has been.
Mrs. Uma: My life has totally changed after being a mother. The completeness of a woman is only after she becomes a mother. It was very difficult to manage both my career and family but being around with the kids made me forget all my tension and the hectic life.
Me: How was your day planned at that time?
Mrs. Uma: I still remember that I had to getup very early to cook for my children, pack their boxes for school and send them to school by 8:00 a.m. Then cook food for my husband and myself, make for my children' evening snacks and give them in the day care and reach my office by 10:30 a.m. I had to again pick them up from the day care by 6:30 p.m. and plan for the dinner. This was my daily routine. Apart from this, I was even more stressed and tired during their exams, report cards, PTA meetings, science exhibitions etc. All these events needed more planning and preparations.
Me: I can understand how it would be without any help around.
Mrs. Uma: Yes, it was difficult and I was very particular about their mannerisms also. I always used to guide them from beginning about their career, studies and now my daughter's married life. Even after that the responsibility doesn’t end.
My granddaughter is my new responsibility. I love to take care of her and support my daughter in bringing up her child. It makes me content to be with Shaina, take care of her small things, play and enjoy with her which I couldn’t do with my own children because of my career. So it is a never ending journey of a motherhood.
Me: As you managed major milestones of your kids alone, am sure it would not have been easy for you to pull it. How was that experience like? From where you drew the strength to handle the challenges of parenting so beautifully and gracefully.
Mrs. Uma: I had a very strong support system. I had my Husband, mother, father, my siblings who supported me a lot in my tough challenges during my transfers, my late office stays and my kids' summer vacations. My family was always with me and supported me to pursue my career and grew professionally and shared my load when needed.
When my husband passed away, I had to take major decisions of my children all alone like their career and marriage. The strength automatically comes because of the responsibility of your children. I always tried my best so that my children should never miss their father and I had to take the ownership and responsibility of both father and mother.
By God's grace I could choose the right paths for both my children and I am so happy with my son in law and he takes care of me like my own son.
Me: At what stage of life you thought that your kids are independent now and don’t need your assistance for little things.
Mrs. Uma: Honestly, Even today they still take my suggestions in their work, job change, higher education etc. I guide them in all the way. The children are independent and can manage their things themselves. But for me I still try to make sure that they are doing the right things.
Me: As both your kids are grown up and engaged in their own life, how much have you graduated or grown up as mother?
Mrs. Uma: I am very happy that they have accomplished their major parts of life. They are involved and busy with their own issues. Now I am more enjoying the motherhood as I don't have to do the regular things. Now a days you get so much help for daily things easily, so now I am delighted in this space and reliving my motherhood through my granddaughter.
Me: Share your experience as a grandmother?
Mrs. Uma: I really enjoy being with my grandchild. I am able to do many things, take care of her, play, enjoy with her which I could not do with my own children because of my career.
Me: What do you think Deepthi as a mother?
Mrs. Uma: She is independent like me and can manage many things herself. She is a very good planner and takes responsibility of the family. She handles both career and family in a such a nice way. She is very confident and bold in her decisions.
Me: What is the major difference between Deepthi and you as a mother?
Mrs. Uma: I don’t see much difference between both of us. She is also very responsible towards her child and gives her best to her child as a mother.
Me: How has motherhood evolved or changed in comparison to your time?
Mrs. Uma: The technology has really helped this generation mothers to teach many things to their kids easily which we did not have in our generation.
Me: According to you, what is a good change and a bad change new age mothers have adopted irrespective of their work status?
Mrs. Uma: Well, Good thing is that technology has helped mothers in educating kids from an early age. And bad thing is that they don’t teach their children about sharing and sacrificing. They give the child what ever they ask for. This generation kids are very addicted to electronic gadgets.
Me: What is the best memory of yours as a mother?
Mrs. Uma: The best memory is when my children were born and the first time I held them in my arms. Also, my daughter’s marriage is very memorable thing for me.
Me: Any advice you would like to share with all the new mothers out there?
Mrs. Uma: Give importance to your children and don’t run behind careers. Handle both in a way that you would not miss out the small things of your children.
Me: Thank you Mrs. Uma for being part of the series.
Mrs. Uma: Thanks for making me part of this.